‘Comparing yourself with other people will definitely make
you unhappy and bitter.’
‘Never speak ill of anyone no matter what’
"You meet a person who is fitter than you. You appreciate and
admire that this person is fitter than you, and then your mind immediately
tries to find something wherein you become better than that person. For
example, he may be fitter than me, but am richer or taller or have a fancier car,
or I dress better."
We find ways to console our mind or to compel our minds to think
that way, to make ourselves feel better than the other person. True admiration
and appreciation loses its luster and value. It becomes something we say for
the sake of saying, or in expectation of something.
When you truly appreciate or admire someone, not only is
that person left feeling good, so are you. That’s when you know how genuine and
meaningful your appreciation or admiration is. It should leave YOU feeling good
and happy too.
He always wondered how his dad could be so happy all the
time. Yes!! All the time!
His dads answer was simple. "I never speak ill of anyone and
I never compare myself to anyone’.’ Why should I care about what people think
of me or say about me, unless my behavior is causing some sort of harm?"
Talking ill of someone usually stems from envy, hatred,
being insecure, angry or bitter or in attempt to put you on a higher pedestal
than others. It has no gains for you or the person you speak ill off, but only multiplies
negativity and it is negativity that makes us feel insecure, angry, sad ,
depressed or jealous.
No two people can ever me the same, in terms of health, financial
power, relationships etc. The happier you are or want to be depends on the way
you treat yourself and others around you. Comparing will only push you lower
and lower. One day you may compare yourself with someone and find out that your
better, so you feel good, but beware of the day that comes, when you find that
someone who is better than you. It’s a vicious cycle, a deadly trap that you
want to prevent yourself from falling into.
The best benchmark for comparison is you. How you inch
forward each day in various aspects of your life. Can you be kinder than you
were yesterday, can you be humbler than you were yesterday. Can you run or walk
a little longer, can you do an extra push up or squat, do you feel better than
yesterday etc..
If you feel negativity in a group or a person, move away,
before it consumes you too. Encourage people to stop talking ill about anyone.
Some groups or circles thrive on putting others down. It makes them happy; it
makes them feel more important.
It’s easier said than
done like most things, but the first step you take is the first step towards
progress, and the more you do it, the more it will become part of you and your
soul.
